‘BREADCRUMBING’ – The new age dating!

“Hook-up culture’ has given us mass confusion. It’s made it hard to define what we’re doing with a person. We find ourselves asking, ‘Is this a date?’, ‘Are we a couple?’, ‘What are the rules?’ ‘What are the expectations?’ ‘Am I one of many?’ ‘Dare I text them first?’ ‘Is it OK to let them know I like them?’ ‘If I express a concern, will they dump me?”

Susan Winter

Caroline swiping through the dating app and in retrospection thinking about her uncanny pattern of falling for douchebags. Though she has always craved that perfect unicorn and rainbows kind of relationships, somehow every time she finds out ‘he’s just not that into you’. Was that just her or there is something she doesn’t know about the rituals of dating these days? Talking about the rituals, millennial dating has made various codes in which it gets easy to find the hidden thoughts and feelings of your date, interesting?

Jane, 18 yrs. old senior year girl and her gang loves to discuss every detail about the date they go on, and then it’s time to decode all the gestures of the guy.

“I dumped him coz he was a megalomaniac”

These days just first meeting decides whether it’ll go somewhere or not. All that requires is that spark at the first date. Everybody is so busy with their career and life that it gets hard to do try those old school ways of knowing each other, instant coffee is everybody’s thing.

The right one!

It’s good that present generation is too open about what they want and their needs and that makes it easy to cut off that delayed process of finding the right one. It’s not just with the millennial but the midlife crowd prefers that too, no wonder we have various dating apps these days luring us to not waste time anymore and get on with the search.

Now, the ritual isn’t that easy as it seems. “Having fun has become more and more important in today’s culture. After the initial spark wears off and the routine sets in, we become frustrated, bored, and want to experience the spark again. Many people would rather start fresh than fully dive into the other phases of love. And the ease of finding someone online takes away the perceived risk of ending up alone”, Claudia Cox.

The chemistry!

A survey shows 70% breakups occur because of lack of sexual chemistry. These days’ people with their kinks and other desires leaves them wondering whether they can get a partner who can fulfil them all? They always look for the first glare spark, leaving them thinking how it’ll be under the sheets.

Jane and her friends discuss that every minute detail about the steamy sessions to judge whether to go ahead or not.

“Hook-up culture’ has given us mass confusion. It’s made it hard to define what we’re doing with a person. We find ourselves asking, ‘Is this a date?’, ‘Are we a couple?’, ‘What are the rules?’ ‘What are the expectations?’ ‘Am I one of many?’ ‘Dare I text them first?’ ‘Is it OK to let them know I like them?’ ‘If I express a concern, will they dump me?”

Susan Winter

Though not everyone gives it the first priority, that really takes the cherry away. “A man is known by his chivalry” Mae West perfectly quoted the most desirable characteristic of a man. Though we are running in the age where men and women have equal rights to whatever they want to do but still somewhere at the bottom of the heart of a woman, she wants the guy to pull the chair or be protective and concerned about her.

Knight in the shining armour!

The story of Knight in shining armour has a different version now. Lia 24 yrs. successful writer has a totally different opinion about this “why does he clears the cheque, we both independent and earning we should split” she does have a point but the date every time doesn’t know this side of her, Bamm! Thank you next.

Back in the day’s relationships were relatively black or white like either you’re together, or you’re not. Today, there are multiple shades of grey that exist that kind of gives the confusion, and as long as both parties are aware and agree, who is anyone to dispute that?

Friends with benefits, a term originated from that grey area where they are standing on the border line of getting committed or just emotional and physical give and take treaty.

Relationships today can look however they want and the ability to have sexual relationships outside of monogamy has accelerated that idea.  At the end of the day, while modern dating may be hard, it becomes easy and difficult both because even if you know you found the one but this social media always keeps the doors open to dive into this vast sea of finding someone better , someone more appropriate and some more suitable , the search goes on.